Please give me feedback on my essay for the novel Animal Farm

Describe a memorable conflict in the text.
Explain how this conflict highlighted an important issue.

A memorable conflict in the novel ‘Animal Farm’ written by George Orwell was between Napoleon (a boar who represents Joseph Stalin) and Snowball (who represents Leon Trotsky) over the important issue of abusive power.

This was the most memorable conflict because it decides which path the rest of the novel takes. If Napoleon took power over the farm with all his lies and propaganda the care and well-being of the animals would completely disappear. He only really cares for himself and only does things for his own advantage. If Snowball was to gain power over the farm things would be completely different and there would be no lies or propaganda and the animals would all be well cared for. Snowball wanted to set up a committee so that all the animals had a say in everything that happens and nobody feels left out of anything.

‘Animal Farm’ ended up with Napoleon having absolute power over the farm and all the other animals when there was a conflict for power. Napoleon had trained nine dogs that he had taken from one of the dogs Jessie as young puppies so that they would obey him (who represented the KGB with Joseph Stalin) which he used to chase Snowball off the farm. With Snowball gone, there was nobody to go against Napoleon which gave him complete freedom to do whatever he wanted that showed how he abused his role of power.

Napoleon found a new love for whisky, he removed almost all the area which was meant to be reserved for the old retired animals who could no longer work so that he could plant crops of barley to make the whisky, this showed how selfish and ignorant he was as a leader. He also broke all the commandments and kept changing them for his own likings, he changed “you may not sleep in a bed” to “you may not sleep in a bed with sheets on” this represents selfishness and betrayal, which all shows how he abused his role of power so easily without the majority of animals realising until it was too late for them to do anything about it. This is similar to the real world because greed and abuse of power are all around us and have been around for along time. An example is communist Russia between Joseph Stalin and Leon Trotsky which the novel is based on. The author George Orwell tries to warn the readers of people who are abusing power and trying to take advantage of us all before it is to late to do anything about it.

In conclusion, the most memorable conflict in the novel ‘Animal Farm’ written by George Orwell was between Napoleon the selfish boar who only cares about himself and Snowball a kindhearted soul who wants all the animals to benefit from each other.

Kiā ora english1000. Great to see you on the forum.
You clearly know the text well and the background.

You mention both parts of the question in the introduction, telling us who the conflict was between and what the issue was. Perhaps a good idea would be to think about the word memorable also. It was maybe memorable because it allowed us to better understand the idea for example? You do describe the form the conflict takes a little but it might be helpful to set it up a little first. How did it reveal itself? What actions were taken by each of them? What caused the conflict? Was it a conflict of ideas? How was it resolved? Then you could move onto looking at the issue that the conflict raised which is the second part of the question. You look at this in the fourth paragraph but it could be developed a little more to include why the desire for abusive power is so destructive and morally wrong, which you could end the conclusion with. Overall you are absolutely pon the right track.